More MLB: Power Rankings | Expert Picks | Latest news & notes | Fantasy news
Before we begin, let us hoist up the tenor of things by reading -- with snifters brandished -- a passage from Geoffrey Chaucer's The Canterbury Tales ...
The Summoner's Tale
lines 480-491: Thomas farts thunderously in the friar's hand
| |
|
| 480 |
"A!" thoghte this frere, "That shal go with me!" |
| |
And doun his hand he launcheth to the clifte, |
| |
In hope for to fynde there a yifte. |
| |
And whan this sike man felte this frere |
| |
Aboute his tuwel grope there and heere, |
| 485 |
Amydde his hand he leet the frere a fart, |
| |
Ther nys no capul, drawynge in a cart, |
| |
That myghte have lete a fart of swich a soun. |
| |
The frere up stirte as dooth a wood leoun, - |
| |
"A! false cherl," quod he, "for Goddes bones! |
| 490 |
This hastow for despit doon for the nones. |
| |
Thou shalt abye this fart, if that I may!" |
|
| 480 |
"Ah," thought the friar, "this shall go with me!" |
| |
And down he thrust his hand right to the cleft, |
| |
In hope that he should find there some good gift. |
| |
And when the sick man felt the friar here |
| |
Groping about his hole and all his rear, |
| 485 |
Into his hand he let the friar a fart. |
| |
There is no stallion drawing loaded cart |
| |
That might have let a fart of such a sound. |
| |
The friar leaped up as with wild lion's bound: |
| |
"Ah, treacherous churl," he cried, "by God's own bones, |
| 490 |
I'll see that he who scorns me thus atones; |
| |
You'll suffer for this fart- I'll find a way!" |
|
(HT: Librarius.com)
With that intellectual foundation established and with those auguries of what's to come, here's some video and audio of Padres manager Bud Black quite possibly ripping wild thunderclap-vapors as though poised astride an airport urinal ...
In some cultures, that's considered the proper way for a gentleman to announce himself. As for Bud Black, he's at his place of business; thus, so, ergo and therefore, he is handling his business.
(Wink of CBS eye: Deadspin)
